back to reality.

summer is officially over.

today i went back to school.

it is my third and final year of my photography program.

i'm not going to lie and say i'm not excited, but in general, i'm more nervous than anything.

up until now the program has been somewhat a little slack.

but i know for a fact third years go absolutely mental by midterms.

i'm not looking forward to that...

in addition to this, being back at school brought me full circle to where i had left off with my stressful thoughts from last semester.

i don't think i am a bad photographer. nor do i think i am the greatest. i'm still learning, i'm getting there; however when you're surrounded by so many people aspiring for the same thing as you, you start to make comparisons with your own photo knowledge to theirs.

it's evident, i am good at what i do. i love what i do. and there's no doubt in my mind i want this to consume my life until the day i die.

there's a but.... BUT i am one of those photographers who has no technical knowledge of things.

ie: i don't fully know how to use a light metre. what i know about different lenses and their functions is little to none. the photo lingo is still foreign to me.

there's another but.... BUT at the end of the day i am me, i say FUCK IT. i am who i am, i do what i do. i don't (& shouldn't) have to feel pressured to conform to how 'other' photographers do things.

i'm a free spirit & an experimentalist.

and you know what? i'm going to keep it that way.

of course, i have my down days. so these thoughts ain't over just yet.

here's hoping for a wonderful, productive & stress-free final year!